The Prestidigitator

Yes, Im not very good at social situations. That includes everything from marriages/funerals to parties. To prove some of my critics wrong (who claim I’m too much of a wussy), I decided to attend (I’m putting this as formally as I can!) a disco organised at work and boy oh boy did I learn a lot!

• Do not promise any friend no matter how good/pretty he/she is that you’ll attend a disco.
• Do not believe anybody when they say “Anybody can dance! Just let yoursef be free”, because it’s a bloody lie!!!
• I dance like a girl.
• Just because one dances well in the shower does not mean it works equally well in the midst of  a 1000 odd people.
• No matter how dark it is on the dance flor, you cannot hide for long. Eventually people are going to pull you in and trust me, it isn’t pretty.
• Try not to go to a disco with a full stomach. It is a tad bit uncomfortable.
• Never underestimate your “quiet” friends. You’ll be amazed at the nonchalant abandon with which they dance!
• Trying to make a conversation on the dance floor isn’t wise.
• I can’t can’t can’t dance to save my life!!!!!

Just finished Mostly Harmless by Douglas Adams. He was definetly one of the funniest people ever! The book begins in the most nonsensical fashion and the twists are just plain silly (I mean it as a compliment) but in the end everything falls into place like a beutiful puzzle. Great stuff! I think this one’s my favourite from the Hitchhiker series.

Listening to Closer by Joshua Radin

photographs and brightly colored paper
are your mask you wear in this caper
that is our life
we walk right into the strife
and a tear from your eye brings me home

Later

PS The above two grainy shots are the only ones I could get with my SLVR L7

The Good: Today was the exact antithesis of yesterday. Enough said!

The Bad: We may have training this sunday!

The Ugly: My first salary is just going to be the pay for 12 days…which is peanuts!! Aaaaargh!!!

So it’s like this…I had a lousy day for no particular reason. A really really lousy day and that too…for no humanly discernable reason.

Back in school and college, I was always known as the goofy guy who said stupid things (intentionally people, intentionally) and mostly friendly and cordial. Today for the first time, a guy comes and says that I look perpetually lost and that to everyone so far, I’ve come across as the eternal recluse. I politely disagreed and sulked for the rest of the damn day!

It also had me thinking on how much I’ve changed over the last couple of months. It is a bit unnerving and I’m not sure which of these are actually good:

1. I’ve developed a strong liking for all corn and corn related products (sweet corn, corn flakes, corn on the cob, corn flour…ok not that.).
2. I’ve become really really really cynical about people in general. I find myself drifting in and out of conversations and at most times, I have no idea what we’re talking about.
3. People are starting to tire me…a lot. I seldom believe anybody anymore.
4. I talk to myself a lot more than I used to. (I know what you’re thinking. *weiiiiiirdo* Right?)
5. I’m beginning to get really scared about getting older. I really don’t want to.
6. I’ve suddenly got so many plans for my life. Want to do so many things with my life…but I’m not sure I will.
7. I’ve started listening to hindi songs and shockingly…I sing them too (much to the consternation of my friends).
8. People hum in the bathroom…I’ve begun dancing!!!
9. I’m really starting to like the Bible again…Ecclesiastes is such a poignant book! Existential angst like you’ve never read before!
10. I realised that unlike most people, I can never read classics. Keep Dickens, Shakespere, Conan Doyle etrc…away from me.
11. I think I actually like this whole “part of the software industry” bit.
12. I’ve started really delving into topics like “purpose” ,”my place in life” and “meaning”.

I think the song that pretty much captures how I feel like is 100 Years by Five for Fighting.

Ah! Life! The futility! The beauty of it all!

Click the pic below for a look at what may very well be the coolest pic of its kind after Gattaca and Shawshank Redmption!!

Later

 I’ve been here in Hyderabad for exactly a month now and I’ve been thinking of “reviewing” the city but decided against it because…well…I’m just too darn lazy!

Make no mistake, I LOVE the city. It’s huge, clean, affordable, hip and truly amazing! But there are things that have left me totally dumbfounded as well.

Yes, yes, yes, traffic is a problem everywhere including Bangalore,but since you have bumper to bumper traffic there, a guy can actually cross the road. Try crossing the road here in less than 10 minutes and call me up…I’ll pay you (it took me 35 minutes the day before).  Every single day, I almost become road kill. Just yesterday, this van missed me by an inch (or did I miss the van? think about it!) and I got a lot of stares and disturbingly, a few chuckles! I do believe that life is absurd and trust me, all those theories on existentialism or the absurdity of human existense is not gonna stop you from cringing when you come close to facing your mortality!

People don’t give two *you-know-what* about traffic rules around here. Traffic lights are merely decorative fixtures here and traffic policemen are mostly manequins sporting uniforms! It’s impossible to find any vehicle, be it a cycle or a BMW that doesn’t have a dent here! Aaaargh! My decision to stay off the road has become stronger.

The few places in Hyderabad I’ve been to are pretty amazing especially the IMAX…Superman Returns on the IMAX was simply one of the coolest visual experiences I’ve had (Naysayers, stay away! I’m tired of backing the “man in tights” always). I’m yet to find a good coffee place though. Hussein Sagar Lake and the Buddha Statue were pretty cool too (from a distance that is). 

Yesterday, a friend of mine introduced me to the YMCA’s K-Circle (Quiz Club)…3 hours of awesome quizzing! Loved it! Made me feel like an idiot throughout though.

Training is a drag but I’m not finding it that uncomfortable or anything…I guess I can manage (3 months. hoooboy!).

Later

“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last 9 months floating… then you finish off as an orgasm! Amen.”

- George Costanza
Seinfeld

If anybody out there wants to make me shriek like an excitable little boy, get me this!!!!

I’m already working on the documentary I’m gonna shoot with this baby! If only things were that easy…sigh!

Take comfort where you find it
Whatever gets you through
Take comfort don’t be blind to it
You must do what’s right for you

Every one at times must run for cover
Don’t you know you really can’t be blamed
For in this you’re just like any other
There’s no need, no need to feel ashamed

Take comfort where you see it
Whatever makes it right
Take comfort when you need it
To help you through the night

By the way we live in our confusion
And the way that we misspend our youth
By the time we’re stripped of our illusions
We may find illusions are the truth

Note: Don’t even ask why I posted this. I always considered myself to NOT be the touchy-feely kind of guy. This song (Take Comfort by Bread) just contradicted that didn’t it?

Anybody who’s ever read this blog knows that I fell in love with this book called The Long Reverie of Partha Sarma. So imagine the surprise when none other than the author C. Sriram commented on the post I wrote some time back. I’m a sucker for these kinda things. Check it out here.(http://ontheverge.wordpress.com/2006/05/26/busy/#comment-121)

Later 

“Each image in a dream evokes uninhibited emotion, be it joy or fear; there is absolute belief. What amazes is the juxtaposition of the strikingly dissimilar: for in thought, linear sequence implies causation. At times, latter events in the dream find unqualified validation in the former. At other times, preceding events are entirely forgotten and the moment reigns absolutely. We wake from dreams of love saddenned that their anarchy isn’t real; we force ourselves awake from nightmares and give thanks for the occasional reason in reality.”

                       – C Sriram (The Long Reverie of Partha Sarma)

Thanks to training being so damn hectic, I rarely have dreams at night but I manage to catch a few moments of shut eye in class during the breaks (7.30-8.00 am and 12.30-1.30pm) and sometimes even during class. My dreams have become much more irrational and at the same time uncannily real (like). I’ve made it a point to write them down…lest they be lost to the world forever! Here’s a sample.

I drift along a place that looks strikingly similar to an airport lounge. I walk towards the immigration desk and on my way see a number of smiling faces including those of long lost friends, teachers and relatives I haven’t seen for a very long time (one of them incidently being a cousin from Hyderbad I still haven’t called up). Suddenly feeling very conscious, I look away only to see my brother “slide” by saying, “She’s here”. I look forward again and see a girl with her back towards me. Long hair. I hear my name being called out repeatedly. “Wake up, sir’s here.”

Chikun Gunya. It’s on everybody’s lips around here. It’s a viral disease of some sort that is bound to leave the victim bed ridden for atleast a week. The weirdest bit is that the only preventive measure everybody knows is a set of homoeopathy pills. I don’t really believe in alternative medicine. So should I stick by my ideals or should I stay safer than sorry? Bloody agnostic!

Tomorrow: SR…again…at the IMAX!

 Listening to Free Loop by Daniel Powter

Wow! Training is pretty monotonous…can’t wait to actually start working! My stream will be Oracle. So, in 3-4 months I shall hopefully be one of those bespectacled nerdy looking fellas punching  stuff into computer databases! Ah the good life! Otherwise I like this…I like being here…right here…right now!

Got to go to a few places here…the city is huge! Finally went to the much talked about Hussein Sagar Lake!

This song called For Blue Skies is somehow always playing in my head these days:

It’s been a long year
Since we last spoke
How’s your halo?
Just between you and I
You and me and the satellites
I never believed you
I only wanted to
Before all of this
What did I miss?
Do you ever get homesick?
I can’t get used to it
I can’t get used to it
I’ll never get used to it
I’ll never get used to it

For blue, blue skies
For blue, blue skies
For blue, blue skies
For blue, blue skies
I’ll forgive you

Later